How to choose a tutor.?

My 12 yo daughter is in 6th grade %26amp; is below grade level in just about every subject. Unfortunately, I trusted the schools decision each year they moved her to the next grade. I thought if they didn't hold her back that year, that she must be doing well enough to move ahead, yes, even though she had C's and D's. Because of my ignorance, I feel I am the one failing her now.





I do not feel that keeping her back now would be a good decision. I should have done so years ago, but as I mentioned before, I thought it was up to the school to hold her back or at least suggest that I do so if that was the case.





So, I'm thinking the school system is also at fault for failing my kid so I'm going to need to "grab the bull by the horns." My thoughts are to get a private tutor, but how do you choose? Do I have them work on every subject with her or just one or two so she's not failing them all?





Sometimes the worst thing about being a single mom is making all the tough decisions alone.

How to choose a tutor.?
You need to figure out what the problem is first.





If she has poor study habits, doesn't turn in her work, doesn't know how to study for tests, etc., then a tutor can work with her on all of the subjects at once. He can help her organize her materials, learn how to study, learn the value of turning in work every day, etc. If there are tests coming up, or materials that she doesn't understand, he can work with her on those.





If the problem is more basic, if she really didn't learn enough previously to understand what is going on now, you might need to have a tutor concentrate on one or two subjects at first. I'd suggest working on reading first (since that affects most other subjects) and then math (since that's also so basic). The tutor should probably spend a portion of the tutoring time going over basic things that she's supposed to know already, but doesn't, and part of the time working on current assignments. (If she doesn't work on learning the basics that she missed, she'll always be behind. If she doesn't work on current assignments, she'll keep failing. So the time needs to be spent on some of each.)





If the problem is emotional, counseling might be a better use of your time and money. A lot of kids from single parent homes are angry about their family situations, but feel that they can't speak up about it, so they often act out their anger by refusing to do well in school. They think that it will hurt the parent that they are angry at, and don't realize that it hurts themselves instead. I've seen this happen a lot of times, and often the parent doesn't realize that it is the source of the problems, so it is a possibility to consider.





You might want to sit down with her and calmly get her to talk about what the problem is. Then you'll better know how to deal with it.





To actually choose a tutor, you want to talk to them about their methods, about your daughter's needs, about your schedule, about their costs, about where the tutoring would take place, etc. and find the one that seems to best fit with what you want. Have an idea about what you want the tutor to do (should he test her skills first or just start helping her, should he work on all subjects or focus on one, should he come to you or you go to him, should he let her direct the tutoring session by telling what she thinks she needs to work on or should he take the lead); then you can communicate what you want and see if he's willing to provide that or not. Be flexible, since the tutor may see things that you don't and may see a need to approach the problem differently, but don't give up all control--speak up if you think he's going in the wrong direction.





There are a lot of tutoring companies out there. They usually charge a lot but they'll offer comprehensive testing and will have a detailed plan on how to deal with the problem. You can ask at your daughter's school (a lot of teachers will tutor after school hours; some schools have free tutoring available). Or at a local college. Or post an ad in the newspaper. Or check the newspaper's classified ad listings. Or ask at the local library--sometimes they offer tutoring services or know of local tutors or have a bulletin board for listings.
Reply:When we hired a tutor for our niece, her teacher told us to call around to local colleges because many of them have lists of students who tutor for extra money. We found a great one that way and she helped our niece a lot. They met once a week at our local public library. If I were you, I'd probably just start with the worst two subjects first. Another thing you might look into is finding someone to teach her things like study habits and test taking strategies. Those are two things our niece's tutor taught her that really seemed to help her in every class.