What do you think of my poem? I'm having it printed in a poetry book.! Watch for my others soon to come!!!

Please edit if you see mistakes..thanks!





A New Mouse





Today I bought a new mouse


This mouse now has a house


It sits on a happy face


It's quite the perfect place


My mouse doesn't walk around


Nor eats cheese that's fallen on the ground


It doesn't have much to say


It doesn't really play


Though it does enjoy it's ball,


as it rolls around, only 1 inch tall


It will follow a command,


with the gentle guide of my hand


It does what it's told,


pretty good for only 1 day old


It has no whiskers nor a tail,


but it sits close while I check my mail


Though it's owner needs a tutor,


this new mouse is plugged


into her new computer!





C.Bray 2005





Well? What did you think?


SmileyCat : )

What do you think of my poem? I'm having it printed in a poetry book.! Watch for my others soon to come!!!
I think it is sweet and happy. It would go well in a book for children, esp., who are learning computer skills to break up the doldrums of all the dry computerese and other lingo.





One correction: Third line from bottom "it's" should not have apostrophe in the possessive form, just "its" not "it is", that's how I remember that rule.





I don't know what is up with Super b above me, but if you feel that wasn't nice of him, you know what to do, right?
Reply:I thought is was cute imagery- had no idea it was a computer mouse until the end!





Keep writing!
Reply:I didnt like it..sorry
Reply:I love it, but there is a mistake, The "it's" in "Though it's owner needs a tutor," Should be "its"





But still VERY GOOD!!!
Reply:not very good ...really
Reply:It's a little Twee for my tastes, but other than that I like it :)
Reply:it's amateur to put it politely. Don't give up the day job or if still at school don't leave just yet
Reply:I thought it was funny would you mind if I saved this if I put you nick name and put it in quotes??


what were you talking about "thought it enjoys it's ball


"as it roll around, only one inch tall"


was that the mouse!! I am confused
Reply:Carefull, DO NOT SEND MONEY untill u check out the company. Alot of ripoffs out there, they got my son for 50 bucks last year and we never got a book. Good poem though
Reply:Word of warning, if this is being published by Poetry.Com they may well just be publishing it to get you to buy copies at an extortionate rate.
Reply:I love it .. peace and love to you and yours !!
Reply:very good well done you deserve a gold medel really :).XxXxXxXxXBLESSxXxxXxX
Reply:i think it is just really cute, and made me smile alot. i will think of it offten, while working at my desk. thank you for the smile to day, its a great little poem
Reply:too young to write...
Reply:absolute bo.llocks!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Your like 12 right?
Reply:It's soo niiiiiiceeee !!!!








Please make some more about your keyboard, your printer, your mobile, your answering machine, etc, etc.





What could we do without all this love among us??? My mouse will never be the same now...





;)